The lady doctor asks me every Sunday after breakfast and pills,
her big eyes hiding behind the spectacles,
to describe how I feel.
But I don’t know how to
I close my eyes and I see it, it’s like a colour with no hue
I can feel it in my bones
I can taste it in my beads of sweat
I can smell it in her breath
But I can’t paint it with the words of my tongue
Fear, she calls it.
With just one syllable
as though it is a tiny being
it is never tiny
what I see, she can’t see
pinning me to my metal bed,
This one syllabic word is a goddess
goddess of doom
carrying in it’s belly
an ocean of unborn dreams.
~Susanah Omohunola Ajiboye
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